With changing times, there is a major shift in thinking regarding gender stereotypes, however, long-term conditioning still persists in our Indian society. The attitude of an Indian mother still remains unchanged, she does nurture higher expectations from her son. Situations may differ, but more or less the mindset remains the same.
If a mother is alone, widowed, or divorced, she leans heavily on her adult son for emotional, mental, and economical needs. She may start pandering to all his wishes, in the process she might turn him into an egoistic person by putting him on a pedestal.
If the son is economically independent but is still living with his parents, it is important to give him space, respect him as an adult, give due importance to what he thinks/says and, respect his privacy. A mother’s role becomes very important in such a situation as she has to maintain a fine balance in the family, especially between the father and the son.
If your son is living on his own, do keep it in mind that you make short calls only especially on a working day, avoid calling at odd hours, and preferably send a message prior to calling.
Avoid making long visits, and on those visits DO NOT try to set his home as per your requirements.
Both my sons are settled in the USA for the last few years, every single day we exchange at least one message to enquire about each other’s well-being, and every weekend we share the highlights of our week. Friends, it’s important to have open communication in order to remain bonded without compromising our freedom and privacy.
It is an accepted fact that Sons are more attached to their mothers, this is good for their emotional wellbeing. For adult boys, this is one relationship where they don’t have to be tough, manly, or macho. With their mother, they can share their emotions without being judged.
As a mother it’s our duty to make them independent, just take care that you do not cling to them. Do not try to turn your son into a Mamma’s boy, just to feel important.
Mother and Son’s relationship is so beautiful,
Friends, keep it that way.
Renuka.